Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

How do teachers justify punishing a student for fighting back against their bullies?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

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I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Why does my vagina and around my butthole itch? I don't have weird discharge and I'm still a virgin.

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I can count

What is the best music album of all time?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

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I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Why is dating so frustrating and difficult for a guy?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Why is my older sister so mean to me as if I was her enemy?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

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I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

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I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

What happens when your partner doesn't see the value in you and continuously hurts you by searching for something in others knowing it hurts you?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

How would you feel if your friend confided in you that she is cheating on her husband, knowing that he loves her deeply? What emotional and ethical considerations would you grapple with in response to her revelation?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

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I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t buy bullshit

I always feel very tired after I do some exercises, even after a night's sleep. What's the problem?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I can read

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I actually pay taxes

What is the reason that Worcester, Massachusetts is not as well-known as Boston and Springfield, even though it is a large city with many neighborhoods?

I see through liars

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t cotton to rapists